Driving in Naples is simply a matter of ‘doing’, what could possibly go wrong? Pumped with adrenaline, I grab the remote control for the gate and walk to my car in the sweltering heat. The gate squeaks and creaks as it opens. I reverse through a sharp turn, narrowly avoiding pots of palm trees that are repositioned every day by the neighbours to prevent ‘wild parking’. We move them back so that we can get out. A nice game of back and forth.
I drive down ‘our street’ and my sturdy 4WD immediately proves its worth. Screeching tyres over dented gutters and emerging sinkholes. With some lively Italo House or Neapolitan Pino Daniele on the stereo, this off-road experience is even better! As I race down the steep slope, I try to enjoy the phenomenal view of Pozzuoli bay. On to the big, bad roundabout at the bottom. Because that’s where the ‘real work’ begins.
What you end up with is reminiscent of something produced by Nintendo. Whoever goes first and does not wait has the right way. The trick is to look out of the corner of your eye and give it some gas. If you hesitate the slightest bit, you ‘lose’ and the ‘waiting ones’ behind you will either yell at you or flash lights at you. ‘OOOOO, daaaiiiii, ma vaaaiiii! Ma che faaaai!’ (Come on! Go on! What are you doing!) Hand gestures – sometimes made while letting go of the steering wheel completely, and driving at full speed – reinforce the ‘instructions’. For a long time, the rest of the occupants watch you, hanging out of windows, or glued to the rear window.
The cars themselves seem to have been driven straight out of a bumper car attraction at the village fair. Full of dents and often without side mirrors. What use are those anyway? It’s more than a little awkward with all those scooters and motorbikes overtaking. But I learn fast. This exciting driving style suits me. Perhaps the biggest problem will be to unlearn it somewhere else. In the meantime, I manage to get through the Hauptstraße in Germany without tailgating and honking.
A column by Joletta de Man
Joletta de Man is an expat partner who lived in Naples, Italy, before relocating to southern Germany with her family. She writes regular columns for Global Connection.
This column has also been published for the thousands of expat partners that Global Connection supports around the globe
